Carter’s been monitoring a senior missionary in Kiribati that has not been well. He died a week ago. He and his wife are from Tonga and the Tongan government wouldn’t let them come back home because of Covid, even though there was no Covid on Kiribati or Tonga. He’s been in the hospital there with limited medical care. They did the best they could. I’m so sad for his wife. She can’t get back to Tonga either. She doesn’t know the Kiribati language. He served a mission there as a young man and wanted to go back and show his wife where he served. They have been serving there since August of last year. Now the people there are serving her. We continue to pray for them. We learned that the church is working on flying his body back to Tonga. I hope that can happen.

It’s interesting that it’s the looking back on something when I realize the blessing:

New Zealand is having a 2nd wave of COVID and I have been struggling with another lockdown and not being able to be there for Jacob and Gracia’s first baby. A few weeks ago on an especially hard day, I had been looking at YouTube videos on how to make masks. I didn’t have any plans to make anything, I was just interested in watching how they were made. Then the words President Hinckley’s father told him came into my mind, “Forget yourself and go to work!” So….I started making masks. All kinds. All flavors. I tried lots of different patterns. I used whatever fabric I had and it was fun. I spent almost a whole week making them. Our kitchen table had barely enough room to eat on because of Carter’s jigsaw puzzle and my sewing machine but we managed. Carter was my cheerleader and oood and awed at each one I made. We can only use so many masks so I’ve started giving some away to the other missionaries and I’m going to see if some of my neighbors want any. We haven’t really needed masks yet, but with this 2nd lockdown New Zealand is starting to require them when we are out in public.

I’m out of fabric and elastic now so the mask making has halted until the stores open again but it was a fun time! My brain and my hands were busy and it got me out of my selfish inward thinking.

I wonder how many people have been helped by those words from President Hinckley’s father. I sure am grateful for them.

Carter learned about writing Haiku as a form of healing. Basically it’s counting syllables on 3 lines… 5, 7 & 5.  It has required some time and thought for me. Here are some I’ve written: 

Heaven sent grand boy
Wish I could partake at the
Family table

Did Ashton send him?
Tutored with an uncle’s love
Eternal nephew

I read an article by Elder Bednar about how their life is different with Covid here. One of the things he mentioned is that they cut each other’s hair now. He says, “The hair cuts she gives me are so much better than the ones I give her!” It made me remember that we gave each other hair cuts last week. Carter trimmed my hair in the back where I can’t reach. I coached him and he did a great job! I told him his dad would be proud. I think he would graduate with honors….if he could ever get into barber school.  

I’m grateful for the mercies of God in giving all his children a chance to come unto Him, whether in this life on earth or in the spirit world.

Oceans of love,    Faye

***No pictures this week, but Jacob has been sending us a Marco Polo almost each night this past week with a little video of Jacob Antonio before they put him to bed. They say he’s a good sleeper for a newborn. They are in love with him and so are we. 

Written by Carter

The biggest news for this week is the birth of Jacob Antonio Mayberry to Jacob and Gracia in Riverton, Utah. Mother and baby are doing well. When President Trejo gave me a priesthood blessing and set me apart as a missionary, the Lord blessed me that our family would be watched over and protected while we were serving our mission. This was one definite fulfillment of that promise.   

I’m reminded of other examples of how our family has been watched over and protected as we have served: Our daughter and her family were able to sell their house, move into our house while their new home went through escrow and are now living in that new home. Her husband, a dentist, has been protected from COVID, so he has been able to continue to work. Their daughter had her tonsils out two days ago and her mother had to stop her from riding her scooter yesterday! One of our sons received the military assignment that he and his wife had been hoping and praying for. Gracia was protected during her pregnancy. She was blessed with the right doctor with the right training and experience to manage her delivery so that she and Jacob Antonio are doing remarkably well!

During Gracia’s labor and delivery, I was reminded of the pregnancy, labor and delivery of each of our precious children! What a blessing each of them are for us and for the world! What a miracle is the birth of a new person onto this earth! Each baby born is evidence to me of God’s existence.

I listened to a BYU devotional by President Spencer W. Kimball entitled “Tragedy or Destiny?” In it, he talks about how many people blame their loved ones’ deaths on God. President Kimball gave some very poignant responses to those concerns. I recommend it to anyone with questions about how death fits into God’s plan for our eternal existences. As he spoke, I thought of Ashton’s suicide: Was it Ashton’s “destiny” to die by suicide? I really don’t know. What I do know is that I trust God and His plan for Ashton and for our family. I also thought of how one of the purposes for our coming to this earth is to learn and to grow. One way we grow is through adversity, pain and suffering. As a doctor, I sometimes recommend shots for children. Do they hurt? Of course they do. Are they for the child’s best good? I believe they are. Does the child understand why it’s important for them to get a shot? No…all they know is that it hurts. As a doctor and parents, we know more than they do about the “big picture.” We know that some pain now is worth it to prevent worsening disease or even death later. As I’m passing through trials, I am sometimes like the child getting a shot. It hurts! It helps if I remind myself that God knows what’s best for me. It has been said that “He is more interested in my character than in my comfort. He is more interested in making my life holy than He is in making my life happy.”   

September 10th is World Suicide Prevention Day. There will be a Virtual Candlelight Ceremony, where all participants will be invited to light a candle wherever they are as a symbol of support for suicide prevention and to remember those we have lost to suicide. Those who would like to participate in this worldwide Zoom event are invited to register at this link.

 Last week, I mentioned that I was working on helping a sick missionary get off one of the Pacific islands and return home to his family on another Pacific island. I have been working closely with Elder Nattress, a General Authority Seventy and a member of the Area Presidency. He has a wonderful sense of humor! He said to me, “I may call you again about this! I’m going to be your General Authority in your back pocket!” My response: “That’s why I’m here, Elder Nattress! That’s why I’m here!”

Faye showed me the Youth Music in the Gospel Library app. I have been listening to them and especially enjoyed “He Will Never Change,” which talks about Christ being “…like a mountain in the storm…” How true that is! What peace and comfort that knowledge brings to me…the “peace that passeth all understanding!”    

I testify that, as a companion scripture to the Bible, the Book of Mormon testifies that our loving Father in Heaven has a divine plan for our lives.  

Our big news this week is that Jacob Antonio Mayberry Velasquez was born on August 19th to Jacob & Gracia at Intermountain Riverton Hospital in the Salt Lake area. He weighed 6 pounds 14 ounces. Our prayers were answered for the health and safety of Momma & baby and they are doing well. Daddy Jacob is doing really well too as you can see in the picture!
He is adorable and we are in love.  We can’t wait to meet him in person! 

He is grandbaby #8

Written by Carter. I finished the 40-Day Joy Challenge for the third time. I’m going to sign up to do it again. I like it because it helps me “have a track to run on” in my efforts to experience more joy, knowing that a) “Man is that he might have joy” and b) that I am able to bless others more as I experience more joy myself. Of course, I don’t obtain improved results unless I do something differently than I’m now doing them…but I love the motivation and ideas that Tommy Newberry gives me in this challenge. I’m grateful for good men like him who help me live closer to God’s plan for me. If you are interested, click on the link. It doesn’t cost any money, but you “pay” by his sending maybe 4 email invitations during the 40 days telling about paid programs you can sign up for. That seemed like a small price to pay for the good material I received. You can always just delete those…but those were thought-provoking, as well, and it took me less than 90 seconds to finish each of those promotional emails. Each “joy challenge” activity could be completed in 10-15 minutes. I don’t get anything from your signing up; it’s just been a big blessing for me and I’m spreading the word.

I finished reading Life After the Death of My Son: What I’m Learning, by Dennis L. Apple, who is a Christian minister whose son died of a sudden illness at age 18. It was very thought-provoking. I highly recommend it for parents who are grieving their child’s death…and for those who might be trying to provide emotional support and love to those parents.   

The senior missionaries had a family home evening on Monday at the area office. Everyone was assigned another person to “highlight” and comment on Christlike attributes they had observed in the other person. One of the couples gave a short lesson from Elder Neal A. Maxwell’s inspiring June 1996 Ensign article, “Becoming a Disciple.” It was wonderful just being together. Of course, ice cream with toppings afterward was a nice ending to the evening!

I initiated the evacuation of a missionary off one of the Pacific islands to Honolulu for emergency medical treatment. It was amazing to see all the moving parts to that process: the area presidency, the Missionary Department in Salt Lake City, the insurance company (Aetna), the transport company, the mission nurse in Honolulu, the hospital in Honolulu and the government leader in the island nation had to approve the plane landing amidst a pandemic lockdown. Yesterday, I had to send an emergency email to the airport manager, certifying that the missionary being evacuated had a medical emergency…or the manager wasn’t going to let the plane land! Fortunately, my email sufficed and the missionary is in Honolulu! Breaking news: the mission president just called me. All the tests in Honolulu were negative!

A miraculous sidenote to this medical evacuation: the initial plan was to charter a non-medical plane for the evacuation; the Church had even paid for the flight to make sure it happened. However, there were enough medical concerns about the missionary the decision was changed to make it a medical evacuation. What to do with the paid non-medical charter flight? There were some missionaries who were stranded on this mission because they couldn’t get flights in to take them home because of the pandemic. Apparently, the medical flight arrival softened the decision-makers on the island enough that they allowed the charter to land, also, and they took these “overdue” missionaries home! It’s amazing how the Lord orchestrated all this to put His servants where He needs them to be at this time!

Another missionary was admitted to hospital with abdominal pain who was diagnosed with a liver abscess from amoeba! I’ve read about that in my training, but was never involved in a patient with that condition. I consulted with an infectious disease specialist in US on management. The mission president was concerned because the missionary wasn’t doing well that night. He wondered if this missionary might need to be transported off the island…but where to send them during pandemic? The other missionary was a US citizen, so could go to Honolulu; this one wasn’t! I spoke with the Seventy in Salt Lake City who oversees Missionary Medical about this sick missionary. He told me he was going to put his name on the First Presidency’s prayer roll…something I didn’t know existed until my mission here! I told the mission president this, and he conveyed this to the missionary and their family. The next day, the mission president told me: “This missionary is doing so much better today. Their family said they are doing better ‘Because the prophet prayed for them!'” I believe that is true, but I’m also sure that the faith of the sick missionary and their family was a big factor in their improvement, as well! What a blessing to see miracles like that.

I think I mentioned previously that a missionary was knocked down in June and bitten on the face by a dog. They had plastic surgery right away, but have now developed a keloid scar. They have darker skin pigment, so a steroid injection could soften the keloid, but also cause loss of pigment, so the scar would be more noticeable. I’ve had several emails and calls to a US plastic surgeon on how to manage the keloid. The missionary’s mother is concerned about the long-term appearance. The mission president asked me to call the mother, which I did today. She didn’t speak English, so a local Church leader interpreted for us. They both sure seem to be good people: humble, grateful, but also concerned for the injured missionary.

I received a jigsaw puzzle as a birthday gift. It’s been interesting observing how Faye and I approach solving it. What a blessing to have two complimentary personalities in our marriage! I confess that I don’t always see the differences as a blessing…but I’m striving to repent and do better here — with the Lord’s help!

I listened to two BYU Devotional talks that I recommend: a) Successfully Failing: Pursuing Our Quest for Perfection and b) Wrestling with Comparisons. One of my favorite quotes from the first one was by T.S. Eliot: “If you aren’t in over your head, how do you know how tall you are?” It reminds me of when I chose to take an honors level organic chemistry class in college. Several times in the class I realized that I was “in over my head,” but I learned and grew so much more than I would have had I stayed in the other class! In the second talk, he uses the term “wrestling to the ground” the human tendency to compare ourselves with others. He also uses the term “sit with” that weakness, get to know it, learn from it. Wow! What great analogies! I’m going to strive to implement those ideas as I strive to repent and improve through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I’m given the state of being mortally weak so that I can be humble and realize where my real strength lies: in Christ.

I feel to express thanks for those who have influenced my life: for the faith and perseverance of those who founded and perpetuated the community where I was raised; for my parents, who taught me and loved me; for my siblings and their families, who are examples to me and who love me; for my children and their families, who teach me and love me; for Faye, who is just a “virtuous woman” as described in Proverbs 31;  and most of all for God, Who is kind, loving, merciful, forgiving, patient and the essence of Perfection.    I testify that, as a companion scripture to the Bible, the Book of Mormon testifies that all human beings are sons and daughters of a loving Father in Heaven.

Written by Faye. I was asked to lead the discussion in Relief Society in our ward last Sunday. The talk we discussed was Elder James R Rasband, “A Righteous Judgement.” I felt like I was prepared, but the Saturday before while I was cooking, I felt like I should listen to the talk one more time. As I was listening, I heard in my mind, “Don’t forget the Book of Mormon.” That was significant for me because I was going to skip the first part that talked about the Book of Mormon and focus on another part of the talk. I did end up including that part… and it felt right. I don’t know why I originally decided to skip that very important part and I’m happy to be able to receive that sweet message from the spirit to help me know what was important. The Book of Mormon was an integral part of that talk.

I listened to a podcast from Book of Mormon Central this past week that really helped me. At the beginning they talked about the phrase, “And it came to pass” that is found all over the Book of Mormon. They named 3 reasons why it’s one of the most important phrases in the Book of Mormon. The first one is just because of the literal perspective. It doesn’t say…..It came to ‘stay’ or …..It came to ‘linger forever”. Whatever suffering we’re dealing with right now…it comes to pass. It comes for the purpose of passing. Everything we experience in this life will pass on by. Eventually we will be brought back into God’s presence.

We are back to level 3 lockdown in the Auckland area. They have found Covid-19 in a family in the community and want to stop it before it gets spread too badly. And they want to find out where it came from. They originally said it would be for 3 day but I’ll bet it will last longer. Our church has been canceled this Sunday. (Update: They have not found the origin, so it’s going to be for 2 weeks) It was nice to be back in our Sunday bubble with Kate & Marie. We have some sweet discussions that we could never have with our ward. We are supposed to wear masks when we are in public now….. I do NOT want to wear a mask. I do have some fabric to make some, so I’d better get busy. Carter says he’d better wear one to be a good example.

A friend of Ashton messaged me this week to tell me they had a dream about Ashton and wanted to let me know about it. Here’s part of what they said, “He was calm, peaceful and happy. He was sitting next to me, just talking with me. I don’t remember the words that were said, but I remember feeling supported and loved…..maybe he was just stopping in to let me know it’s all going to be okay. It was good to see him.” I don’t know how dreams work or what those in the spirit world are allowed to do, but I’m happy to know that Ashton is still able to help his friends. It made my day. After he died, I used to hear from him often when I was struggling and that’s what he would tell me….”You’re going to be ok Mom.” That’s his signature phrase. 

Our 8th grandchild is coming this week! Jacob & Gracia’s first, a boy. They are naming him Jacob Antonio. She is overdue and being induced on Tuesday. We are praying that all goes well and everyone is healthy. Hopefully we will have pictures for next week’s email.

Written by Carter. Note: this should have been posted August 9. However, I couldn’t get the photos to upload…and I didn’t get around to fixing it…so will post today without photos. Tomorrow I will post Faye’s letter from this week …and mine the next day.

Faye and I celebrated our 37th wedding anniversary on Tuesday by traveling with a couple from our ward to Piha, where there is black sand on the beach — from the high iron content in the volcanic rock there. It was beautiful! There were a lot of people surfing there; it’s winter, so the water is cold and they were wearing wetsuits. Surfing looks fun, but it looks like it would take a lot of work to become proficient at it!   

I think I’ve mentioned previously that I’ve been doing “Man-Flow Yoga” since about November 2019. For the past 3 months, I’ve been doing the “Bulletproof Your Shoulders” program, which takes about 30 minutes per day. I’ve had left shoulder pain with certain movements for the past 5 years. I had been to a specialist and tried the exercises he gave me — without much benefit. I’ve also tried several other approaches. Well…this yoga program seems to have done the trick with that pain! Yea for yoga (or at least this type for my shoulder)!

My sister, Janice, called me for my birthday this week. We had a nice conversation where we got caught up on each other’s families. I especially appreciated her asking how I was doing with Ashton’s death. I’m not sure why that meant so much, but it did. I read something this week that rang true with me: something about not looking for sympathy when someone mentions their deceased loved one; it’s just that their memory is the only thing that’s still alive on this earth. It lifts me so much to know that others remember Ashton, also.

We celebrated one of the other senior missionaries’ birthdays with 3 other couples last night. Again, it’s wonderful to have such good (and fun!) people with whom to associate!

I participated in a mission health council (MHC) with the Tahiti mission president and his wife. They are local members and he is a Church employee. They are serving on an interim basis until the new president can arrive from the US. I also participated in another MHC with the Samoa mission. I also spoke with the Marshall Islands/Kiribati mission president. It sounds like the conditions there are quite primitive — conditions accentuated by the current pandemic. I commented, “I hope you are keeping a good journal! You are making history there!” I would not be surprised to read stories in future histories of the Church about how missionaries, members and leaders have adapted to the pandemic. Stories from these outlying areas will probably be among them.       

I testify that the Book of Mormon teaches of life’s purpose and explains the doctrine of Christ, which is central to that purpose. I believe that with all my heart.

Written by Carter: I trained a new mission president (and his wife) over Zoom on how to use the Church’s medical software to monitor and care for missionaries’ health. They will serve in Fiji…whenever they are able to travel there. Not coincidentally, they live about 15 minutes away from where Jacob and Gracia live! They asked if they could deliver a gift when Jacob Antonio is born in the near future. What a kind offer!   

We also had dinner at the home of a couple in our ward who have done a lot of traveling around New Zealand. They gave us some tips if/when we are able to travel again. We’d like to go next to Wellington, on the south end of the north island.   

Another night, we had dinner with two other senior missionary couples who wanted us to give them tips on traveling around Queenstown. One of the “hidden blessings” of serving a senior mission is all the fantastic friends we have made with other missionaries, members and other neighbors in the areas where we have served. Those friends have been a tremendous blessing for us!   

Yesterday was my New Zealand birthday and today was my US birthday…so I have celebrated for two days! Yesterday, Faye made my favorite chocolate cake (see a previous post about that) and we had four other senior missionaries over to help eat it and to play Five Crowns, a very fun card game. Today, Faye made my favorite meal: pork chops! And I had some more chocolate cake!   

I’ve been memorizing some scriptures about marriage. I’m realizing increasingly what a precious gift Faye is from God to me! May I pay her a tribute? Ecclesiastes 9:9 says this: “Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun.” To me, that says that one of my main purposes in life is to live joyfully with Faye! Proverbs 31:10-12 says this: “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.” Wow! What a blessing to be able to safely and implicitly trust in Faye!   

After meetings today, we visited the 84-year-old widow we told you about in a previous post. She is such a delightful person (“lovely” is what they would say here)! We had a wonderful visit! She shared some touching experiences she had recently. I felt honored that she trusted us enough to share them.   

I’ve been participating in Tommy Newberry’s “40-Day Joy Challenge” for the third time. This time, Candace is my accountability buddy; that alone has been awesome! In one of the sessions, I made a goal to postpone my worrying to a specific time. I don’t think I worry excessively, but I do worry sometimes. I was reminded of Scarlett O’Hara from “Gone with the Wind,” who said, “I can’t think about that right now…I’ll think about that tomorrow!” I decided to set my timer for 5 minutes, close my eyes and think “What if/worst-case scenarios.” I found the best time to do that is in the morning, right after breakfast. That’s when I feel the best and when the worrying is least likely to “get away from me.” It has been an almost-fun experience to have this time set aside! Often I’m done before the timer goes off.   

In another lesson, Tommy encouraged me to ask myself joy-producing questions. Most recently, I’ve been thinking this to myself when drying off after my shower: “What are four of my best strengths, and how could I use them more often in the next week?” It has been fun to think about how I can use the strengths God has given me to try to bless others. When we served in the Peru Mission Training Center, Faye  attended a Relief Society class (for women) where she made a list of my positive traits and gave me the list. Being a “words of affirmation” person, I still have that list in my wallet. I used the traits on the list when asking myself this question in the shower.   

Here’s an inspirational quote from a recent video devotional for the area office employees and senior missionaries: “Life is so generous a giver, but we, judging its gifts by their covering, cast them away as ugly or heavy or hard.  Remove the covering and you will find beneath it a living splendor, woven of love, by wisdom, with power. Welcome it, grasp it, and you touch the angel’s hand that brings it to you. Everything we call a trial, a sorrow, or a duty, believe me, that angel’s hand is there; the gift is there, and the wonder of an overshadowing presence.” Fra Giovanni, a 16th-century priest and scholar.   

My favorite scripture this week is Isaiah 40:31 “But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” What a promise! I believe it with all my heart! I have experienced it personally and have witnessed it happening to others!   

My favorite thought for the week: How do I build my faith? By doing what God asks me to do even/especially when I don’t know why. That may be some of what Hebrews 12:2 and Moroni 6:4 are talking about when they say that Jesus is “…the author of my faith…”; it’s not just me believing. Christ is actively involved in helping me grow my faith.   

I witness that Joseph Smith was given the gift and power of God to translate an ancient record: the Book of Mormon — Another Testament of Jesus Christ. As I’ve stated before, I believe that the Book of Mormon is the word of God and a companion scripture to the Bible in testifying of Christ.