Written by Faye on July 8, 2014
I have an appointment to order Ashton’s headstone today. I’m not sure how I feel about that. It needs to be done, but it sure seems final setting something in stone. Is he really buried there? The little grave marker says that’s him. The note attached to it from a friend is written to Ashton. The old UofA colored balloons, lifeless on the ground, suggest they were for Ashton. The flowers my friend said she put there on Memorial Day are still there. I do remember the graveside service. It was the dusty blue casket Candace chose for Ashton that was lowered down into that grave. I do remember my little granddaughter, Hannah, sitting next to me, inconsolable, as the casket was lowered. It must have been Ashton in that casket. She adored him.
I do remember that Mayberry tradition …. men taking turns shoveling the dirt into the grave and filling it back up. I love that tradition. It gives the men who don’t let themselves cry have a way to get out their emotions. I do remember so many vigorously taking part in that, even some women and children.
I do remember a little niece asking for a flower from one of the arrangements. We went over to get one out and then all the children wanted one. Ok… let’s do it. I wanted them to be a happy. Then the sweetest little flower frenzy started and I let them go for it. They were having way too much fun! Did Hannah put that first flower in the dirt? I don’t remember… but the kids took over and “Ashton’s Fiji Garden of Love”, as Hannah declared at the end, started taking shape. Our sad little graveside turned into a beautiful expression of love that only children can produce. I apologize to those who sent us those flower arrangements, but not really. You didn’t know you would be contributing to a beautiful memory for our family. The children stripped those arrangements clean! After the flowers were gone, they took the ferns too, which just added to the tropical look we now love in flowers.
I feel the need to attach a picture so anyone reading can smile and see. What should have been a sad, sad ending… was not. We all walked back to our cars a little less heavy hearted because of what we had just witnessed. Children are such a blessing.
Ok… here I go. Yes, Ashton IS buried there and he needs a proper headstone so we can find his grave easily and tell that story…..that story of the children and the flowers…Ashton’s Fiji Garden of Love.