Ashton ~ January 2014 ~ Canning applesauce
“Remember him with me. Invite him to the table this year too. I need to know that you remember he lived. Share his stories, his memory, his life, his love. And if you’re open to blessing my aching heart even more, I invite you to SAY his name out loud with me. Often. And without hesitation. To hear his name is to hear the most beautiful sound there is. May it always be on the tip of your tongue like it is on mine. There is no greater gift.” by Angela Miller ~ stillstandingmag.com ~ Thanksgiving 2013
I didn’t realize until I read this article how much I love and need to hear Ashton’s name. It is the most amazing name on the planet. I know some people worry that if they say Ashton’s name, it will make me cry. Well… it just might…but they will be happy tears. It makes me happy to hear his beautiful name.
Just for the record…. I have officially changed the the name of Pink Lady apples. They are now called Ashton apples. I need to let the apple orchards and supermarkets know that important piece of information. I just bought a box of Pink Lady’s… uh…Ashton apples…. from Briggs and Eggers orchard in Willcox. We are going to can apple sauce soon. Ashton helped us do that last year. He is an apple fanatic, but he’s an apple snob too. Those apples are his favorite. He would eat 6 or more a day when I brought those home. They really are the perfect apple… little sweet, little tart and perfectly crisp. They also make amazing apple sauce. I’ve been giving the apples away to neighbors and family. If you happen to be one that receives some Ashton apples from me, they are just my way of sharing Ashton’s love of apples and sharing his name.
I’ve given so many Ashton apples away… I don’t have enough to make applesauce now. Guess I’ll have to get another box or two. Can’t ever have too many Ashton apples. Love that name so much better. Don’t you?
Written by Faye
I have a simple little memory of Ashton that I have been thinking about lately. I had wanted to tell you about it because it is of Ashton, but it is so simple, I thought it might be kind of silly. Ashton ALWAYS said hi to me when we passed by each other. Always! But it wasn’t just the fact that he always said hi, it’s that he always said, “Hi Kristina.” He always called me by name every time we saw each other. That is special to me. I think it is really neat since Ashton and I weren’t really close, we didn’t really hang out, we were in different friend and age groups…But he just showed how he cared for others and made them feel important regardless. He was a special guy!
Thank you for taking the time to share your memory of Ashton. We love to hear any memories that people want to share. You are a special girl too, Kristina!
Ashton IS a beautiful name. I love him because I get to know him through my beautiful/loving friend Faye. Thank-you for sharing all the love and beauty in your life. Your friendship gives me Hope and inspires me to be a better person. You are an “Earth Angel” to me Faye and I feel so very blessed to have you in my life. Thank-you, thank-you! Love my wonderful Ashton apples and I love you too.
Vikki… you are a treasure! Your friendship has blessed my life too.
love this! as I am an apple snob, too 😉 Ashton’s Apples are my favorite as well. But I didn’t know of an orchard around here that grows them. I read an article about them recently that talked about how they’ve gained in popularity in the last couple-ish years. And also that they are particularly hard to grow. It was very interesting.
I love your posts. I love the word joy as well. One of my favorite words, actually. I’ll share the joy I found today with you. My oldest son who is 7 decided to make a crib for our baby (to be born in April) and set out with his hammer and nails and made a decent box from some scrap wood. He wanted to put it in our room and then started to look for some leftover fabric to make a blanket. What a sweet gift from an older brother. It made my heart swell… Joy.
Thank you for sharing your JOY with me. What a sweet son you have! If you live close… I would love to share some Ashton apples with you! Us apple snobs need to stick together!!!
I love Ashton apples too! That’s what they’ll be called here from now on. I thought of you yesterday when I was decorating for Christmas and put up my “JOY” sign. I couldn’t figure out the best place to put it, until I found that it sat really nicely in the garland above the fireplace mantle. Hope you’re finding lots of it this season. Love you, Faye and Carter!
We are finding JOY with the help of so many people like you, Louise. Thanks for sharing with us. Love you…
Dear Faye and Carter,
I just recently heard about the loss of your son Ashton and my heart truly goes out to you. I’m not sure if you heard but my daughter Jessica, who was born with many heart, lung and GI defects, passed away on 10-4-10 at the age of 22. She suffered through many heart and other surgeries and procedures, chronic GI pain, lung bleeds, 2 strokes, and the list goes on. She never surpassed the level of a 7 year old so she was forever my “little girl”. Jessica also suffered from depression and had sooooo much anxiety! I spent more time caring for her emotional needs than her medical needs especially during her final years. I kept a blog about her life but haven’t written much since she died.
Reading what you both have written about Ashton makes me think that I should share my journey through grieving too. It’s refreshing that you both are so open and honest and by expressing your love and faith your writing is uplifting. I thank you for that. I also appreciate that you are open about how your son died. Far too many people are secretive about their loved ones who have committed suicide and I applaud you for your bravery to talk about it so openly. I’m sure that your will help others who find themselves in similar circumstances.
It’s been 4 years since I last heard my daughter’s voice or felt her arms around my neck but there are many times that I can still *almost* feel those arms around me again. I feel her with me sometimes more than others. As the months and years go by, look for those little tender mercies. They are there! We talk about Jessica daily. We laugh at the little things she would say or do and we discuss what she must be doing now that she doesn’t have her diseased body keeping her back. We’ve faced many things since her death, many of which we’ve caught ourselves saying, “It’s a good thing Jessica isn’t here to face this because she would have been soooo scared or upset, etc.” We know she is in a safe, loving environment where she isn’t plagued with the anxieties and depression that she had when she was on earth.
Ashton is in that same loving environment and he is no longer plagued with the ailments of this mortal life. I hope you feel that too.
Feel free to get in contact with me if you like. I just sent you a friend request on FB, Faye. I know you were mainly Brian and Melanie’s friends but I consider you friends as well.
Much love,
Nancy
I do remember you Nancy and I remember Jessica when she was a baby. I remember she had heart problems. I’m so sorry you lost her. I’m so glad you contacted us. Your story gives me hope that we will make it too. I love it that we are getting in contact with your family again. We have good memories of Brian’s family when we lived it Tucson.