Picture on Ashton’s headstone. Vuna, Fiji

My Dad called me late this afternoon, “I have the headstone set up. You need to come see it.”

I did… it was hard.

But, it’s beautiful. The picture on it is amazing. It’s perfect of him. It’s taken in Vuna, Fiji, on the island of Taveuni…one of the happiest times of his mission. The afternoon sunlight is just right on his face. It shows the beautiful green of Fiji and and the sea he was surrounded by. He’s in his sulu and black flip flops. I love those flip flops. He wore them every day when he got home except when he went to church. If you come to our home, you will see those same flip flops just inside our door, where he always left them. They just belong there. I wear them sometimes when I go out front to water or take the garbage out. His brother Jordan wore them last time he came home. He wears a lot of his things when he comes home.

My dad stayed at the cemetery with me while I cried and arranged the flowers and things that sweet friends have left there. My father was the one Ashton spent his last full day with on earth. I thanked him for that. They rode together on an 8 hour car trip. Ashton went to help him drive. I’ve heard it was a quiet trip and I know Ashton felt comfortable with his grandpa who didn’t require him to say much. He wasn’t into talking much at that point. He got really quiet towards the end of his life. Too quiet…

I took Carter out to see the headstone later that evening. It was dark. We had to bring a flashlight. Some kind, sweet soul put a solar light by his grave, so we can always find it at night. Thanks for that. We got to stand out there under the stars and look at it together… and sigh… and cry. We went home and watched part of “The Ashton Show” together.  A family member took all of the videos we have of our children and made a DVD of just Ashton. We weren’t able to watch that for a while, but now we can, and it makes us smile and chuckle at Ashton’s cuteness. That took a lot of time to put together. Thank you… we love you for doing that. It was a good way to end what started out as a sad evening.

Here’s some pictures of the headstone. Our daughter took them. She also tells why the back of the headstone says what it says. If you were at the funeral you will remember the story.

Our daughter, Candace, with Ashton’s headstone.

Our oldest grandchildren with the back of Ashton’s headstone. Hannah 9, David 7, Carter 5.

Candace says…”The back of Ashton’s headstone is the ending phrase of the LDS children’s song ‘I’m Trying To Be Like Jesus.’ When Ashton was a sweet toddler we would sing this song as a family and it was Ashton’s ‘job’ to sing the very last word of the song: ‘taught.’ He did it so sweetly.  So it is now a family tradition to leave out the last word when we sing the song, because it’s Ashton’s solo. This song also perfectly describes Ashton: Gentle & Loving.”

Yes… we have a child buried in the St. David, Arizona, cemetery. It wasn’t in our family plans for Ashton to die. We had hopes and dreams for him. I miss what could have been his future here on earth. I miss the family and those grandchildren he might have had. I miss the vital part he played in our family. But, I do know that my Heavenly Father, Ashton’s Heavenly Father, has a plan for him. Though it is hard to be without him here…I trust that plan.

Written February 23, 2015 – by Faye